Books are friends. We chuckled as my colleague pointed out that sign to me. I was tempted to snap a quick pic. Then I behaved. Simple and straightforward, the basic white paper print-out taped on a dirty street wall aimed to make you look at the eclectic selection of new, used, never used but worn-out by the elements of the street books of this downtown Yangon street book seller. ‘Books are friends’ I reminded my colleague a few days later as we browsed a hip bookshop/coffee shop that felt out of place in an upscale mall. I bought a book titled Zen: The Art of Simple Living by Shunnyo Masuno that explains the concept of zen, applying it to modern living in hundred practical chapters. I plan to read one chapter a day over the next 100 days.
Books are friends and I like to share my book friends with my human friends. So, I am sharing with you my best book friends of 2019. But first, please indulge me in sharing a few tips for how to find more time for reading, as I hear a lot of people struggle with that these days.
- Find time to read at a time that works well for you, even if just for a few minutes. A few minutes every day will add up over time. I read over breakfast and for a bit before going to bed. Those few minutes here and there have gotten me through entire books.
- Read what you like. Some people have a list of books they think they ‘should read first.’ Recommendations from friends and colleagues, books related to their profession, etc. And because they cannot get into these books, they don’t read at all. Forget it, just pick up a book you like and dive in. Don’t let the guilt of ‘not reading what you should’ stop you from reading.
- Take a break from Netflix and mindless TV watching. This was a game changer for me a few years ago. Simply not turning the TV on a few nights a week, I found so much more time for reading. I mean, Netflix is great, but have you thought about how much time you give it?
- Bring a book for commutes and travel. Instead of spending idle minutes during your commute scrolling mindlessly through your phone, bring a book. Read a few pages. Read a chapter.
So, now that I got this little detour out of the way, here are my top books of 2019. While they are all on quite different topics, in reflecting on this, I realize there is a common theme across all of them. Thinking about my year of 2019, it only makes sense that these books rose to the top.
- Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone by Brené Brown. Brown delivers. Always. Whether in her talks or her books, she gives you so much to think about. She encourages you to be open, brave, and do what’s uncomfortable, but necessary for a full life and meaningful connections with others. Braving the Wilderness made me reflect on some more challenging relationships in my life. It made me think about how easy it is to judge and play mind-reading games, and how damaging it can be. It gave me ideas for how to do better.
- The Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert. I picked up this book at the airport in Dar-Es-Salaam. It was dusty, small, tucked in the corner of the dark shelf, but it caught my eye as I was looking for something to entertain myself with during my flight back to Washington, DC. And it was a great pick. With a simple, convincing narrative, Gilbert encourages you to seek your inner creative self and express yourself creatively in whatever field speaks to you. Everyone is an artist if they want. And they do not have to fit the stereotypical narrative of an artist. Do art on the side, do it not for the money or fame, but because it brings you joy. So, if you want a little inspiration to get unstuck in your creativity, check out The Big Magic.
- The Tales of a Female Nomad: Living at Large in the World by Rita Golden Gelman. There are passages in this book that made me say ‘wow’ loud. The words she uses to describe her feelings were exactly the words to describe the thoughts I had in my head for a long time but did not know how to articulate. I picked up this book from my friend’s bookshelf when I stayed with her in Colorado. In the months before that, I had quit my apartment, traveled for a month all around Italy, and drove across the US from the East coast to Colorado to stay with my friend, completing three months away from the city where I had lived for eight years and where my job was. Perhaps unsurprisingly, a title that included the words female nomad piqued my interest. In her book, Gelman describes a life journey she embarks on following a separation and eventual divorce from her husband. She discovers a new self and a new way of living, as she travels around the world, explores new cultures, and experiences the world with open eyes and heart. Misunderstood by some, inspiring others, content inside. How illuminating and relatable this book was. Her story is one of a kind, inspirational page-turner. A few of my favorite passages are here:
Finally, after a little more than a week, I cannot run anymore. I don’t even know what I m running from. When I think about it, I feel good about myself. During the last two months I have discovered parts of me I didn’t know were there: the part that can embrace strangers and enrich my life through knowing them, the part that enjoys making independent decisions, and the part that adores living spontaneously. Until the phone call, I hoped to be bringing this new me into a marriage that could benefit from rejuvenation. But now I fear that my personal development is going to be guiding me through a different stage in life, that of a divorced woman.
One of my friends buys me a drink before I leave. Taking off like that she says is not psychologically healthy. “You’ve got to deal with it. You can’t run away.” But I am not running away. I am running toward…toward adventure, toward discovery, toward diversity.
*****
There are two other book friends that did not make to the top three but deserve an honorary mention. If you want to learn more about relationships, how people interact in them, and why some are better positioned for success than others, check out Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – And Keep Love by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. And then there is The Secret by Rhonda Byron. It has been around a while, but I have discovered it through a recommendation only recently. I found it very inspirational. If you liked my post on the power of visualization, you would likely enjoy The Secret with its tips for how to bring yourself closer to your best life.
So, my human friends, I hope you have found in this some inspiration for your 2020 reading. If you want to share any of your book friends recommendations or want to know what I learn from ‘100 days of zen,’ get in touch. Happy reading.
